Wednesday, March 07, 2007


I tried internet dating back when it first started appearing in Penthouse Letters. Almost instantly this girl Annette contacted me. We chatted online for about a week before she told me she was in the mood for a "serious ass punching." I told her we should meet that night and gave her my phone number. She called and asked me to meet her at this coffee shop down the street from my apartment. I got there and didn't see anyone that looked like the picture she sent me, so I figured she must be late. Two seconds after I sat down, this dude sits down across from me and tells me he's Andy. He then tells me about how he's the one I've been talking to on line, and that the photo he sent was of his sister. I asked who I had been talking to on the phone and he said that that was his sister also, but that he had been telling her what to say. I stood up to leave and he started yelling that I shouldn't turn my back on love, and that it was his words I had fallen in love with so our love was still real, and a bunch of other crazy shit. He also told me I was shallow for not wanting to give him a chance. I stood up and walked away. He caught up with me about a half a block later and asked if he could just give me a blow job and told me that he didn't expect me to reciprocate. I'll admit I was tempted, but I figured that was probably a lie too.

1 comment:

Me said...

Holy shit. This guy seriously thought he was a decent replacement for ANY woman?